She hurt

My heart shatters in my body a lot

It’s such a weird feeling

And it’s always so crazy when it happens

Because it feels the same every time

Nothing changes

It’s not like the pain gets easier

Or it happens less and less

It’s all consistent

Sometimes it doesn’t happen for any particular reason

Like,

I look into the sky and a cloud looks back at me wrong

And I feel my heart shatter

Fall through my guts

And it’s so painful

And also feels like butterflies

It’s as if the tiny shards

Are slowly ripping me open

While gently tickling me

Forcing me to ignore the warnings

My instincts are screaming in my mind

Which is why I am always stuck where I am and how I am.

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